Premature ejaculation occurs when you ejaculate during sexual intercourse sooner than you or your partner would like or before you've achieved satisfaction. It often occurs early in relationships when sexual excitement, anxiety, and overstimulation are common.
If you are wondering how to not ejaculate prematurely, you're not alone. There are a number of things you can try to delay ejaculation, including the "stop-and-start" method, the "squeeze" technique, and more.
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What Is Premature Ejaculation?
Premature ejaculation is identified using the following criteria:
- Ejaculation occurs within one minute of penetration.
- Ejaculation cannot be controlled or delayed in all or most cases over a period of at least six months.
- It causes frustration, distress, and a tendency to avoid sexual interaction.
Is Ejaculating After 60 Seconds Normal?
Ejaculating within 60 seconds of penetration is not considered typical. According to the International Society of Sexual Medicine, the average time to ejaculation is between five and seven minutes.
Premature Ejaculation Causes
You're more likely to experience premature ejaculation when you're young and still learning about sexual activity and relationships, or at any age if you've had a long period of abstinence. However, various psychological and physical factors may also play a role.
Psychological factors that can contribute to premature ejaculation include:
- Depression
- Stress
- Relationship problems
- Performance anxiety
- Early sexual experiences
Physical causes may include:
- Prostate problems
- Thyroid problems (underactive or overactive)
- Using recreational drugs
- A penis that is extra sensitive to stimulation
That said, premature ejaculation is rarely caused by a single underlying disease, structural abnormality, or physical problem. When it occurs infrequently, premature ejaculation is not generally a reason for concern.
How to Prevent Premature Ejaculation
There are a number of techniques that can help with premature ejaculation, including:
- Self-distraction: If your arousal levels are getting too high and a climax is beginning, take a deep breath and think about something else—something very boring if possible. When you are less aroused but maintain an erection, you can then continue.
- "Stop-and-start" method: If you find yourself nearing climax, withdraw your penis from your partner and allow yourself to relax enough to prevent ejaculation. By starting and stopping sexual stimulation, you can learn to prolong the sexual experience and delay ejaculation.
- "Squeeze" method: This method involves either you or your partner squeezing (fairly firmly) the end or the tip of the penis for 10 to 20 seconds when ejaculation is imminent, withholding stimulation for about 30 seconds, and then continuing stimulation. This can be repeated until ejaculation is desired. The stop-and-start method can be used with the squeeze method as well.
- More foreplay: Stimulate your partner to a state of high arousal before you have your genitals touched. That way, your ejaculation and their orgasm can be achieved at about the same time.
- Masturbation: Practice different methods by yourself to learn how your body responds to stimulation and how to delay ejaculation. Getting to know your feelings and sensations gives you the chance to gain confidence. Limited research suggests that penis-root masturbation (PRM) may benefit those struggling with premature ejaculation. This technique involves stimulating the lower one-third of the penis by rubbing the penile root up and down or circularly.
- Wear a condom: Wearing a condom can also desensitize you by decreasing sensitivity to stimulation, thus prolonging the sexual act.
If your sexual health is significantly impacting your relationships or emotional well-being, reach out to a healthcare provider or sex therapist who can help. Sometimes a questionnaire like the Premature Ejaculation Diagnostic Tool will be used during the office visit. Based on their assessment, they may recommend treatments such as counseling, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), or medication.
Medications for Treating Premature Ejaculation
Creams or oral medications can be effective for treating premature ejaculation. They include:
- Desensitizing creams: Creams can be used to desensitize the end of your penis. They act like a local or topical anesthetic. These medications include creams, gels, or sprays such as lidocaine, prilocaine, or benzocaine, which cause reduced sensitivity of the penis.
- Antidepressants: Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, or SSRIs, may also help delay ejaculation. These include medications like sertraline and paroxetine.
- Phosphodiesterase-5 inhibitors: Medications like Viagra (sildenafil) may be used if premature ejaculation occurs with erectile dysfunction.
A combination of anxiety reduction and medication can be used as well.
Summary
Premature ejaculation is common, and it's generally not a sign of a physical problem or underlying health condition. However, there are behavior techniques and medications that can help.
Remember that getting good at sex and overcoming premature ejaculation can take a bit of time. If you find that things are not improving, then help is available from sex therapists or other healthcare providers who are experts in this field.